Wednesday, November 16, 2011

My First Blood Donation

Big contrast to today, yesterday was a fucking good day ♥ my first blood donation was a breezeeeee n I got to be there with y____ bcos her slot was when I was still hooked up. I couldn’t stop laughing cos she was making silly faces n nervous as hell n just freakin the fuck outttt. Before she was even giving, she was hyperventilating pretty bad n basically ready to cry! But she did so welllll n was done damn quick! 

When Mr. Nguyen came in, he said, “k__! The whole nguyen clan is in here right now!” LOL 

Honestly, I was pretty damn nervous too cos I was worried bout fainting, not reacting well, or worst, being deferred :( m_____ came with me, which was so sweet of her  but she hadda sit far away from me cos they couldn't have people standing in the narrow aisle (nurses needed easy access to patients), n then she had class n left. I felt so bad tha she was forreal sitting there for 15 min waiting for me tho! I had no idea!  

My blood test went fine (not anemic!!!), finding my vein was fine. All the nurses were so nice, n Martin Kimberly, the one who got me set up n everything was so good about my questions n taking care of me. I honestly couldn’t feel the needle inside my arm as I was squeezing the stress ball. It was all soooooo much less painful than I expected! So fucking easy! (But y____ said it hurt the whole time, especially the prick of the blood test n insertion...poor thanggg!) Seeing the needle just chillin in my arm was grossly amazing though. It just looked so clearly unnatural, n it didn't make sense to me how my skin n a thin layer of flesh was holding it in place n not letting any blood lose around the opening. The needle looked thickkkkk too. Reminded me of Requiem for a Dream, with all the nasty shots of the guy shooting up heroine into his open wounds. Yuck. Then he ends up getting his arm amputated. I hadda stop thinking bout that cos it wasn't a very good time to hahah. 

The color of my blood, slash everyone's, was so opaque n dark too. So ruby. Kinda beautiful, but still a lil gross. Hahah, I wanted to watch Martin take the needle outa me, but didn't since he told me to look away! Plus, I didn't wanna make him uncomfortable!

For most of my process, I was laying facing Mr. Moore, n I swear his face did not change the whole damn time. It was badass, so I tried the same thing, but ended up smiling a lot! Shot him a thumbs up when he was done, n he nodded back :) I always wonder if he knows me as the girl who misses a lot of assemblies...or if he even makes the connection between my name n my face.

Goodnizzz, I was just so stressed bout getting lightheaded, nauseous, or fainting, thus cutting my donation short. That paranoia was the worst part of the process, but it was all silly :) although it was a liiiiil concerning when I'd try to get up or move after I'd been bandaged n Martin n another nurse would come to me reallll quick n ask me to just stay down! They were seriously so worried but I wasn’t even sure why! They hadn’t been that way with anyone else, n they did it 3 times. Lol all good though, I was just so happy that everything went smoothly :) n it was perfect the way the slots worked out, cos I got to just chill with apple juice n snackies n be there for y____ during hers. I think we've been noticeably closer since the weekend! N ohhhh damn I felt so bad when we were on our way out n I knocked her juice over a table thing in the front of the trailer! We flipped a shit, n were cleaning it up as sneakily as we could!

As he was setting me up, Martin told me, “Thank you. You’re gonna save 3 people’s lives today.”

It's such an interesting, dumbfounding thing to think about, the concept of saving a single, much less 3, lives. Me, of all people hahah. It made me so happy to hear that n think, fuck yeah! I can do that! I mean, I know not every situation that requires blood transfusions are life-or-death matters, but to wonder about the possibility of dying bcos of a lack of immediate supplies, a lack of means…it's something so preventable. So what if it hurts, if im sore, if im tired? It’s a blessing to be alive n healthy, n a sin to be selfish. 

I've known so many people who've received blood transfusions in surgeries, including chi h___ n ba noi. I might've had one when I was 3 too. But basically, I know n have seen how heartbreaking it is to be extremely sick, so why would I not help improve someones health if I have the option?

I just always feel that I don't give enough in my life. With all my blessings, I don't feel that I do enough to pay my dues, to truly deserve them. 

Mr. W_____'s story in class about his newborn needing 3 blood transfusions in the first 24 hours of life, n the way he was choking up, was just amazing. Old people are so sweet.

More lil details: spilled ice cream in Ms. W_____’s car :( sometimes, h____'s sucha douche n doesn’t appreciate me. But whatever, hes not worth stressing. N the a2a hot pot dindin was sooooo nice :) then at night, even though I stayed up til 1:30, it was worth it cos I had some maaad funny convos tha jus added to the good mood I had going. Mostly l____, b____, n s_____. Yeah, Tuesday was a damn good day. Today was depressing, but tomorrow's a new start.

Lets get itttt!

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